It's easy for an adult to give birth to a child, but not everyone knows how to be a good parent. Though I haven't had a child yet, I agree on this
site's rubric [click here] in determining how a good parent should be.
Among all of the qualities listed in the site, I think that what a
child needs and seeks most from a parent is TIME. The time a parent spends with
her child largely determines how she loves her daughter or son. When you truly
love your child, you will find time to bond with your children. Each
day, you will show how much you care and cherish them. But, what happens
if you are too busy and have other priorities than your child? Well, like most
people do, you are hire a maid.
In The Help, Mae Mobley had two moms. One was good and the other
one was not so much. Elizabeth Leefolt hired a 53 year old black woman, Aibileen
Clark, to attend her two year old child's needs. While Elizabeth is too
busy chit-chatting with her friends and playing bridge with the Junior League,
- all to maintain her social status- Aibileen is feeding and nursing Mae who
is suffering from parental neglect. The author said that Aibileen has been
taking care of white babies and household duties for white families since she
was a teen. This tells us that yes, she has a basic idea and is well-experienced as to how things should be done when dealing with a child. But among all of the kids she has served, she considers Mae
as her special baby. She truly cares for Mae despite the child's ugly
appearance, while Elizabeth despises her for it. Aibileen reminds Mae how smart
and kind girl she is. Miss Leefolt, on the other hand, dresses up nice
everyday, "always got her makeup on, got a carport, double-door Frigidaire
with the built-in icebox, you never think she go and leave her baby crying in
her crib like that (Stockett 5)". But Aibileen, the help, always know.
By going beyond the usual duties that a maid is expected to do, Aibileen proves she is a better parent than Mae's original biological mother.
In many homes these days, maids are taking over parenting role. Parents
work to pay bills and have other priorities to worry about. As a result,
they pass their parental duties to their
helps. However, a better income and better social status
does not mean a better quality of life for the children left at home. Growing
up with my personal maid who took care of me for several years, I know for sure that Mae will rather prefer to spend more
time with her parents than be praise by other people for being a child of an elite family.
http://tweenparenting.about.com/od/relatingtoyourtween/a/Good-Parenting.htm
I completely agree with you about the whole idea about needing time! As myself being a babysitter for many different people, you have to have time, commitment, and a lot of patience, not only as a babysitter, nanny, or maid, but as a parent as well. This blog was great pointing out the flaws in the parenting, but I do disagree on one part of this. I would not necessarily say that Mae Mobley had two moms. Yes, Aibileen acted more like a parent than Mrs. Leefolt, but it doesn't mean she had two mothers. On the other hand of that argument I do agree that Aibileen is much better at parenting than Mae's biological mother, which is very sad, but true. Also knowing that you grew up with a personal maid also shows how you have a first hand experience with everything that Mae may be feeling. Overall this blog was very good, very insightful, and had your own voice to prove your point!
ReplyDeleteI really enjoyed hearing your opinion on the treatment of Mae Mobely in the book by her Mother and Aibileen. I completely agree that Elizabeth is not a good parent and is more concerned about her social status and what her friends think of her than being a good mom to her daughter. I also agree that spending time with your child and giving them affection is one of the most important things a parent can do. I heard your voice a lot more in this post and I enjoyed it but there were a couple of grammatical mistakes, nothing that made your post hard to understand though. I also found it really interesting that you have a maid, it was cool that you could connect to the story on that level. Overall I really enjoyed your post!
ReplyDelete